However fleeting, or long term, everyone has been here before. Reminds me of the Bridget Jones scene where she’s clutching the bottle of vodka listening to, “All by myself”. This rut is a tough place to be stuck and following on from the last post, can often feel worse if you live alone. However, I’m here to turn this notion on its head, so I hope you’ll read on.

We’ll all be single in our lives at some point, sometimes it’s a choice. It used to irritate me when I saw articles about how you, “can learn to love yourself” so don’t need anything else – this is nonsense. We all need meaningful connection in our lives, but if you start chasing it in terms of others validation of you, you’ll often be disappointed.

If you look at a puppy, a smiling baby or into the eyes of a new love, you can’t help but smile and feel like you’re buzzing at a higher frequency. You gave YOURSELF that feeling, they simply acted as a mirror to what you are capable of feeling. Science proves that part. In addition, does a new parent “run out” of love for their child? No, of course not, because love can never be simply ‘given away’, it’s generated and felt within you; it simply expands whenever you connect with something that resonates. Many things can do this: a beautiful painting, a magical sunset, meditation, a sky dive, walk in nature, hugging your dog, baking, dancing to your favourite song, helping a lovely neighbour, looking after your niece etc, etc. The fact you are single, has absolutely nothing to do with the how capable you are to feel love or be loved. Love can’t therefore ever be given to you , nor can someone ’take it away’ from you – that’s not how it works.

Sure, it’s important to connect with other humans and having a partner can be lovely, especially when they recognise your greatness. But you never ‘need’ to have a partner; need suggests that you lack something, and you lack nothing my friend. Love is pervasive, so discover the things that make you vibrate at a higher frequency and be happy. Ironically, it’s often during these times that someone sees you shine and you become at your most attractive.

If someone joins you on your happy journey, lucky them. You decide.

Doctor V

Doctor V

My name is Verity. I’ve spent nearly 20 years dedicated to helping people to improve their lives. I used to be a Consultant hospice physician. It gave me a very privileged insight into what people really think about at the end of life. I’d often hear about goals that had been put off, opportunities not taken or dreams never realised. This is where my passion comes from in helping people, such as yourself, to live life on your own terms and with the greatest joy.